Now that my daughter is quickly approaching 2 I always get asked the same question “when will you have another?” my answer is always the same that I honestly don’t know, maybe in a couple of years time, maybe a few years time or maybe even never who knows??? There’s a lot to weigh up before deciding to try for another and we aren’t there just yet.
I have thought a lot about what I would do differently if we do have another. I would be more willing to accept help from friends and family. Early on especially with breastfeeding I felt like it was 100% up to me and I never let anyone help. I quickly burned myself out and next time I would be asking people to baby sit or come and clean the house. I have learned a lot about what I would and wouldn’t buy next time –
Things that I wouldn’t buy
- Moses basket – We had 3 of these, one at home and one at each of our parents houses and every single one was a waste of money. My daughter would only sleep in my arms or attached to my boob! She isn’t much better now. I would wait until she was properly asleep and then as gently as possible lay her down in her Moses basket. within a few minutes she would be wide awake crying. It was a nightmare hence why we started co-sleeping. I never wanted to co-sleep but I felt left with no other choice. I could lie in bed with her happily attached to my boob and then she would go to sleep and I would lie her on her back. We would all sleep peacefully, it was bliss. Also due to breastfeeding (on demand) she was attached to my boob more or less 24/7 (still is) it meant that neither grandparent could really take her off our hands and mind her. Yes I expressed into a bottle, no she wouldn’t drink it. Yes I tried formula and no she didn’t like it – it made her projectile vomit. So there it is, next time I would give the Moses basket a miss.
- Changing table/bath 2 in 1 – We had one of these and we did get a lot of use out of it. I only wouldn’t buy it again as they are expensive and take up a lot of room. I really wouldn’t want one again (unless I had a C-section so I wouldn’t have to bend down). As soon as she started rolling the mat felt very unsafe even with me there. I’m much happier changing her on a mat on the floor. If we have another I will just bath them together in the big bath (with the little one in it’s own baby seat).
- Clothing – It was totally pointless, we had a wardrobe full of cute outfits most of them still had tags on and they got shipped off to the charity shop. She lived in either a sleep suit or vest. I had to change her that much due to sick/poop it was easier to just keep her in them. If you buy nice good quality ones from Next they look very cute and will wash well so they last until they grow out of them. If we had another I would buy it 2 outfits max just for special occasions. If we went out in the pram I would put her coat/snowsuit over her sleepsuit anyway so no one would ever see the cute outfit. Not to mention they grow so fast they wouldn’t fit her. It was a shame as we all wasted a lot of money.
- Shoes – again completely pointless. She wouldn’t keep them on ever! Also they aren’t comfortable for a baby. They don’t recommend a baby to wear any shoes at all until they are walking confidently. Even cruisers don’t help them to walk, the best way for a child to learn to walk is bare feet. We did buy cruisers as our wooden floor was freezing. I’ve since learned that health professionals would rather the childs feet be cold when learning. Anyway each to their own, next time I won’t bother with shoes.
- Manual breast pump – I bought a top branded one but I just didn’t get along with it. It took a lot of time and effort to use. The main thing though was it hurt me, it caused a wound on my breast (maybe from using it incorrectly I don’t know). I know that next time I would buy or hire a electric pump or not use one at all.
- Breastfeeding specific tops – These are costly so I only had about 2, I wore them to death. The problem was they had room for a bump and made me look frumpy. It took me a few months but I discovered the Breastvest designed to go under your normal none pregnancy tops. You just lift your top up and the vest keeps you covered and decent whilst you feed your little one. This was a life changer for me and I can’t recommend them enough. I’ve since got a couple of H&M nursing vests which are awesome too.
Things I would buy
- Bedside co-sleeper – such as the Snuzpod. As I’ve mentioned above my LO would only sleep next to me. I like to think that I could just gently roll them over into this sleeper pod that fits perfectly next to your bed and they will stay asleep. I struggled with the Moses basket and cot as I had to lift them up into it to put them back down. With this as its the same height hopefully it would make it a smoother manoeuver and fingers crossed they would stay asleep.
- Poddlepod – My daughter has the Toddlepod version and it has helped me a lot as I can sometimes transfer her into it for her daytime nap. It does look very comfy to sleep in and is easy to wash. I would buy the baby version and use it instead of the Moses basket for daytime naps, as its small it would be handy to keep in the living room and as it’s light and portable the Grandparents would be able to take it to their house as well. I would also consider the more expensive Sleepyhead which can be used as a mattress at night in their cot.
- Stretchy wrap – I did buy a baby carrier before she was born but it was a disaster to put on so I never used it. We only got into the swing of baby wearing later on and I wish we had discovered it sooner. Next time I would buy a comfy stretchy wrap such as the Hana wrap or a ring sling for quick ups and downs, I would then want a buckle carrier for out and about.
- Swaddles – I never tried these with my LO as we ran out of budget but I did want to try the Aden + Anais ones. I wonder if we would have swaddled her if she would have slept in her basket or cot?.
- Nuna leaf baby swing (no batteries needed) – The electric baby swing was one of the best things that we had when she was little as she loved it and I could pop her in whilst I made some lunch or had a quick tidy up. The problem was that it ate batteries like a Pez dispersed sweets. They were the big expensive batteries too. Even if we bought Duracell they never lasted long. Now it could be because our swing was old and on it’s was out (we got it second hand gifted from a good friend). Anyway the Nuna leaf swing doesn’t need batteries and takes up to twice the weight of the electric swing. Another problem was that she quickly reached the max weight limit and we had to get rid of it even though she still loved it.
- All in one baby food steamer and blender – When we started weaning it was time consuming using different pans for cooking veg (we don’t have a steamer) and then a blender. It made a lot of washing up and then I would need to cook mine and my husbands food also. This little thing does it all in one pot. It sounds glorious as it does what you need it to and with minimal washing up. I like the look of this one by Beaba.
Please let me know if this helped you at all or if there is anything that you would do differently with your second child.